This Old House

s_s__old_house___7_by_shudder_stockNo that’s not my house. It is a future projection of my house unless I 1) win the lottery 2) rob a bank 3) sell the thing and move away.

This afternoon, there I was, minding my own business. I was actually hand washing dishes because the dishwasher died a couple of years ago. I could care – never got a dish clean anyway. As I was scrubbing away at the mess I made while making Cream of Cauliflower Soup – I heard this rushing noise under the sink. Kind of like Niagara Falls only louder. I looked under the sink. (First major mistake).

Hmm. The pipe seemed to be hanging down where it should be attached to another pipe. That couldn’t be good, right? DS was in his room, with the headphones on and the music blasting. He can hear nothing. So I stood there, holding the pipe, praying for release.

Luckily he had to go to the bathroom and I yelled for help when he left his room. Down he came and I told him what happened. He suggested I go sit down while he looked at it (he suggested this rather boldly I thought).

Not only did I sit down, I grabbed an Angry Orchard from the fridge. If any time calls for alcohol, this was it. He sat down on the floor and studied the pipe, the nut that held the two pipes together and got all dirty. He saw the problem. The washer had slipped back into the elbow pipe. Cool. He put it back together and tightened it.

Since that’s been leaking since the winter of 2014, I’m pretty pumped. We think it may not leak any longer. Or if it does, we can go get another washer and some plumber’s tape.

On the same theme, I made contact with the La Di Da landscaper again. Oh yes, he’s going to come give us an estimate. But he wanted to know if I  had a chance to fix the front porch yet, because he didn’t want to do the landscaping to have it torn up for construction. The only problem is, it’s the back porch railings that need repair, not the front porch.

I thought about it. And I interpreted his words to mean this “Get real bitch – you can’t afford us.” So the bitch got real and told him not to bother coming by. I did not explain to him how I will make sure everyone I know knows he is useless and obnoxious. I can do that, yes I can.

I haven’t heard back from the SECOND landscaper. I think the bushes with all their thorns scare people to death. And also the outside of this house looks like I am on my last penny. Well, I’m not. But I also don’t have tons of extra money to do things that need doing. I can keep up with the minor things – major ones? Nah.

At some point in the very far distant future I’m going to sell this house. I will get something from it because I owe a lot less than what it’s worth. And then I’ll move on. And I won’t be moving into a 100-year-old house ever again. Right now, I’d take a mobile home over this place.


5 Comments Add yours

  1. Jennifer says:

    I’m just going to let those Barberry bushes take over. What do I care if the yard looks like hell? Ben keeps the yard mowed and this fall I’m going to pull up all the dead stuff in the back. Voila’ it will be done. Yes, yard work was Ivar’s thing too. I’m not sure if it was because he liked it or because he didn’t have to listen to me while he did it! LOL.


  2. I haven’t touched my landscaping in over 4 years. That was Larry’s job. Everything is dying and/or dead. I am not motivated to do anything about it. I figure it’s a great Halloween house. I have people mow the lawn and that’s it. I wish I cared more but I hate yard work and I don’t take care of it like I should. Besides, there is a gigantic Crimson King Maple in my front yard and it KILLS everything. We’ve had the landscaping done and the ground sodded over and over again and when the leaves pop out, everything around it dies for lack of light. I told the tree to do it’s thing, since it’s way bigger than I am. I know where you’re coming from.


  3. Denise says:

    Oooh, that would be amazing!


  4. Jennifer says:

    Some day we’ll think about it. We’re both comfortable here and it’s as affordable as housing gets in Maine. Of course if I were to win the lottery – the ocean would be outside my door!


  5. Denise says:

    Good job, son. Another Rachel I know has just moved into a beautiful 100 year old flat and coming across plumbing problems. Hearing about these things brings it all back – I used to be forever waiting for the next problem/bank account draining issue to arise. It’s a big relief to be rid of it and I hope you find somewhere that’s beautiful but also practical.


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