It’s Raining


It seems as if winter has decided to slowly drive me crazy. Or maybe not so slowly. A few days before Christmas, we had an ice storm with constant warnings about the loss of power, etc. Then the thermometer plunged so low there were warnings to start your car every two hours to make sure it would run. It felt like -35 below zero for several days. This is the worst winter I’ve spent in Maine and it has been one roller-coaster ride after another of very bad winter weather.

My driveway has at least 3 feet of snow in most places. We only shovel out a path and the back of the car. We spent hours chopping ice off of it twice the week of the ice storm. Today’s high was 51 and it has been pouring down rain all over the frozen snow and ice all day. I think I am in some weird place because the rest of the country has the god-awful cold weather we had last week and the week before.

Getting out to visit my husband is hard. And he doesn’t understand that the roads are bad, or he does and he just wants to see me anyway. I know it is hard for him being away from home and it’s hard for me too. I did get to see him yesterday, the first day since New Year’s Eve. He could hardly get up out of a chair and I hadn’t seen him have that much trouble before. His legs hurt him yesterday and he can’t communicate to me how they hurt. I don’t know if it’s muscle spasms or just aching. I mind that I don’t know. If I knew I would try to do something to alleviate his pain. It is horrible to be trapped in a mind and body that is growing rigid and stiff and to not be able to talk to tell someone what is happening. So I visit and I hope I can see where he needs help. And I pray – a lot. To the same god that gave him this disease. Makes sense.

I’m beyond sick of the weather. I can’t cope with all of the worry about things that can go wrong when I need to be somewhere else worrying about things that can go wrong. I don’t know how long he can survive with this relentless disease. I hope, for my sake, that it’s a while. For his, I’m not sure.


10 Comments Add yours

  1. Jennifer says:

    I hope so – cross your fingers – I’m starting a new sweater now and looking at what to sew. Keeping busy!


  2. Denise says:

    I hate walking on ice. I am the *worst*.

    I hope you are over the worst.


  3. Jennifer says:

    This weather IS awful. I guess it will be in the 50s on the weekend and raining. Which will give us a nice January thaw that we really need. Today’s visit was much better and I didn’t feel so helpless. Walking on ice to get to the car is interesting! I won’t complain when spring comes – even if it’s 90 degrees in the shade!


  4. Denise says:

    I hope you are able to get back to that time when you can enjoy your visits and being together. Of course that pesky weather must have a lot to do with it, making it so difficult to do even the simplest thing, including visiting 😦


  5. Jennifer says:

    I know you’ve been there too. Today I saw him and he was better and more able to move. He was happier too. I just need to adjust myself to the ineptitude I feel. Ah well, I will get back to being my cheerful self (already feeling better) and recognize that he’s happy just having me visit …….


  6. Denise says:

    The cold sounds horrendous. The way it gets into you and I am sure it slows you down and saps your will and energy.

    Your poor husband. That’s a really terrible thing to watch, not being able to help him rid himself of his illness 😦


  7. Jennifer says:

    I’m out of here today too. Instead of being 50 degrees and raining it’s 14 and windy. Cool. I have been tasked with finding myself a birthday present from my son …. it’s work. I can’t decide what I want. LOL save him some money!


  8. You’re welcome. I’m going out tomorrow, no matter what. although I better check if anything will be open. Schools are closed again and nothing’s going on. Way too cold:( I feel the way you do…I want this stuff to go away. I’m glad you like the poem…LOLOLOL Hope you get enough energy to cut something out. I haven mucking out my art room and I’ve been working on it all day. I can’t walk in there yet, the floor is covered with “stuff.” ARGGGG. Did you finish the kitchen? More cat and bread pictures please. I wish they had scratch and sniff bits for the bread:) You can see the weather is making me crazier than usual. Sigh. Have a good night.


  9. Jennifer says:

    Oh I love it! I wish things were different – but they’re not ……. so one foot in front of the other! I absolutely can’t stand this weather – it’s so dark here and raining? Who ever heard of rain in January? And you guys are freezing to death like we did after Christmas and all last week – it makes no sense! I haven’t sewed a thing – can’t seem to get the interest in cutting anything out – maybe this week though – take care and thanks for the kind thoughts and great poem!


  10. Jennifer: you are in a tough spot right now with your husband and this MISERABLE weather doesn’t help AT ALL. We are all going insane from this difficult winter. If it’s sunny, it’s freezing, if it’s gray it’s still freezing but we all have S.A.D. I’m mucking out my art room and dancing to some cool tunes. It distracts me but all the rooms are now a mess and it’s already getting dark and that pulls me down, no matter HOW MANY LIGHTS I HAVE ON! I’m sorry you’re going through all this but you might want to check a comment on your birthday picture. I hope we all get a thaw soon because we are shut down…no school, no garbage pick up…some places are closed and I can’t even imagine what the airport is like. Oh well…bake something wonderful and show it to me, please. That, along with pictures of your cat, always cheers me up. I don’t know what I can do for you, so I’ll quickly write a poem.

    there once was a lady
    named Jen
    she was kind of a
    sweet mother hen
    she baked
    and she sewed
    and did
    i don’t know
    and she
    danced with her
    cat in the den

    I hope this makes you feel better:) I want your bread.


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