This photo from NASA is a perfect metaphor for how pissed I am. I spend most of my time either pissed or depressed. I would love to have something positive to write about, but there it is. It is what it is and it pretty much all sucks.
My husband isn’t happy in the nursing home and I’m not happy having him there. I can’t do the heavy lifting to take care of him at home. Also we don’t have any extra money after all the bills are paid, so I go off to work at a nasty part-time temporary job to earn a few pennies.
I had been a bit excited to be back at work. I was pretty sure I would be given the opportunity to function in the position I had last year which pays a bit more money and is much more interesting than just taking orders over the phone.
Last night I found out that if I want to do that job, I have to go through the whole training class again and they only “have room” for me in the second shift training class. It would be from 5 to 11:30 pm for five days. Well, I’m not doing that. The others in my training class last year were in the rehire training the week I went back and had to be in training for a job I’ve done for four years. I missed my chance this year, mostly because of their rules. I could have come back and gone into the retraining for my old job and skipped the rehire training for the basic phone job. Only they don’t do it that way.
Now I’m seriously pissed off. I don’t want to order turtlenecks, chinos and evergreens for the next few weeks and have no other duties to do. I won’t have many hours (like less than 15) until the week of Thanksgiving and probably not many then. I’m sure I’ll get sent home many of the days I’m scheduled for during even the busiest periods.
And I am conflicted over this. My first reaction is to quit. I won’t be going back next year anyway. I’ve had enough. But the teensy little bit of money might help. It might. It may make no difference at all given that I have to exert myself, can visit my husband less often and have to spend gas to go earn chump change. Not to mention the effort of getting up at the crack of dawn and coming home after dark to do a job I don’t want.
So I’m asking – what do you think? Should I just give it a break now or keep going?